Mangalia visit

Goat herders seen along the fields.

Where was I up to now…

Oh yes, the visit to Babadag. So not only have the couple stayed to help the community by either taking groups from western countries to paint fences, paint kindergarten rooms, donate presents to the poorest children in Christmas, fixing the local playground as well as themselves going into the poorer homes to help families… they also have the rented building where the local kids and teens can play games, table tennis etc, they have couches for them the hang out with a coffee and about eight computers in a basement area where they can either go on the internet or do their homework (some of the kids wouldn’t have access to a computer otherwise). They also teach musical lessons and English to kids who are interested.

Unfortunately no matter how much good you do people still try to get you down. Although the couple aren’t enforcing anything on the kids, they are Christians and believe it or not the people making helping the children most difficult is the Orthodox Church in the Village, which is the most common Christian faith here though is very restrictive, for example some separate men from the woman via seating, women wear head-scarfs and are considered as going to hell if they wear makeup, earrings, nail-polish etc. Basically, by their standards I really don’t stand a chance. But of course this young couple (and I, if I’m going to add my opinion in here) believe that everyone should be accepted  and treated equally… which has meant the Church has openly told the children to stay away from the youth centre and not to take the music lessons or accept their help, which is of course really sad as they are a few of a very small number of people truly giving up their time and lives and asking nothing in return.

When chatting away about the problems in the community, the frequent problem we seemed to get to every time was unemployment. Without jobs there is no money, people go hungry, and then they may get bored, lazy or perhaps break the law to make a living. When we suggested that it might perhaps be a good thing if we could get someone to invest in a factory or industry which would train and employ the local Romanians it was agreed that this was an idea… but one already tried and failed. It appears that the majority of the industry left in the town, the supermarket and a few shops, is owned by one wealthy man, who is “tight” with the Mayor/leaders. When someone tried to start a new business to employ the locals this man (mafia mentioned, though I couldn’t say for sure whether this was a joke or not) made sure nothing came of it. Corruption it seems always lies hand-in-hand with extreme poverty.

Money is of course always hard to come by. They mentioned that only recently they’d had heating installed and the basement where the computers where was very cold (and it was a sunny day outside) I can only imagine it in the -25’C temperatures they get. Interestingly enough the older computers they had just replaced were sitting in a corner and when I commented “well, at least you’ll be able to sell them for a bit of a profit” he shook his head and commented they were giving them away to families and children from the outer village or country that didn’t have them. So often over here I’ve met people who have so little to work with and yet give what they have away with such joy. It’s amazing.

So time for a terrible cliché foreigner moment… Those who are not amused by toilet humour I’d recommend skipping to the next paragraph, but I think this gives a rather hilarious snap-shot into my life and travels. It begins with me having drunk far too many coffee’s that morning, and combining the fact that I hadn’t not gone to the toilet since breakfast, and the long drive to the village, I REALLY needed to go. As I took a look into the two youth centre toilets I had time to peek into before bursting, where I noticed they were both the Turkish style (a porcelain oval bowl below ground-level) I figured what-the-hey and have used the Asian version before so no biggie. Unfortunately I’m really getting desperate to go by this stage and have extreme trouble with my skinny jeans as I’m trying to squat… basically, being the complete amateur I am, although I managed to hold my jeans out of the way of the torrent which ensued, I’d misjudged the porcelain bowl for the conniving object it is and managed to get back-sprayed in my FACE. Hahaha. Only a little bit before adjusting… but none-the-less unpleasant. Thankfully I like to think of all unpleasant occurrences as funny, so I had a wee giggle, washed my face and moved on.

Our time was almost up (we were already late and so missed visiting other philanthropists that day) so we headed out of town to a lovely rest-stop restaurant in the forest. On the way we stopped to see a field which had been bought by a past church and was now passed to the couple, they still hope to build a playground, sports field and community centre there… but of course it’s all money and much needs to be planned before any of this could happen. It’s in a beautiful location too, with a view of forested hills, though still in the middle of a poorer suburb.

My meal of polenta mamaliga and meat stew.

The couple have three young children and as the restaurant had a small zoo attached (random) in-between chatting and the meal we looked at the animals. The kids loved animals which must be a family trait because as we chatted I found out that Mimi’s father and brothers run a bear rehabilitation project (bears being found wild in Romania)… the family actually got started when they were given three young abandoned cubs and ended up taking care of them. Seriously? You can’t make this kind of stuff up.

For lunch I had a local specialty of polenta mamaliga (which is like finely chopped sweet-corn, egg and cheese which looks a lot like cous cous) and a really flavourful meat stew… delicious! The meals here are HUGE.

That night we ended up staying up really late (thus my catching up on the blog today) at a University Students International night, where mostly medical students studying in Constanta (which is the second largest city in Romania) celebrated the end of the year. It was a rather interesting clash of cultures… we and those who’d invited us turned up on time, at 7pm, the Romanians (who are known to run things without a schedule) turned up about 45min to an hour late, and the large number of African students turned up after this. I mean, I’m still recovering from being trained in the military, and I get antsy if I’m a minute late to a meeting… but this was bordering on unbelievable. Turned out to be a great night though, lots of fun, entertainment and laughs, and I ended up sitting next to a Scottish couple who were missionaries and had moved there whole family (three teenage sons) to Romania to work with the youth in a small village, where they ended up staying 6 years (to date).

Although they insisted that it was very hard work and slow progress, they are making a difference. The husband compared the fact that when they arrived there was just “deadness” in peoples eyes, but now they drive down the street and see smiles and can barely stop waving as everyone that passes by greets them.

The richer side of Mangalia, the Marina's.

When asked what the hardest part is they mentioned how no matter how genuine you and your motives are, the people (especially in a small town) gossip and suspicious. Many refuse their help because of rumours they sell children to their western friends, or steal the children’s organs, or other ridiculous stories. People here more than most find it difficult to trust, after all it was never shown to them before… and the country has lived in “survival mode” for so long.

The other thing which really encouraged me was when the award for “Best Leader of 2012” went to a very tall, athletic African woman. Although this might be seen as a normal occurrence in another country, I remember thinking to myself how opposite the African and Romanian cultures are… and that the woman who received the award must truly  be a spectacular leader to fight against so many of the stereotypes, prejudices and societal restraints she would face here.

The night really was a good one, and we all got hugs all round on our way out from the dinner, such an awesome bunch of people. Clearly the leaders and hope of tomorrow. I must admit though, after all the travelling, and the flu I’ve managed to catch, I was exhausted and dropped after posting yesterdays blog.

Entering the poorer areas.

This morning began with the leadership training I’d talked about earlier, where there were worries Leanne might not be able to take some of the sessions because of her gender. Thankfully if went fantastically and she was really well received, although it was a smaller number than hoped, all those there were of great quality, which gave the training a team- feel to it all.

The afternoon brought a trip to Mangalia, which was a city/town I visited on my first trip, we were shown around by Faradin who works in the very poor gypsy and Turkish communities in Romania. Originally a Muslim himself (Turkish) he became a Christian as a young man and against his whole family began working in the community and trying to help the poor. Slowly over time his whole family converted and now work with him in many of the projects he does, currently his work among the “unreachable” communities, whether providing children with clothes, food, visiting the sick, giving music lessons, fixing or helping clean poor families houses, has been recognised by the local authorities, who are now giving him financial support to reach more people.

He took us to one of the worst neighbourhoods and if you’d seen the conditions the people lived in there, you would be as much in awe with this man as I am. I have very few photos of the place because I felt so bad I could barely meet peoples eyes, let alone get out a western camera to take a photo of the place they called home, and I would just be using on a blog. Urgh.

We drove through dirt streets which reminded me of what I’d seen in Haiti, houses (or more accurately shacks) of wooden planks, corrugated iron, and bits-and-pieces struck together for shelter… the conditions are barely acceptable in summer, but when you try to imagine that families live here without heating in winter!?! It’s crazy.

The first house we visited actually belonged to Faradins brother and his large extended family, they were at the training session in the morning and are the loveliest people… I wouldn’t have imagined they lived… here.

The conditions were basic, same patchwork buildings, no doors, concrete floors covered with rugs, a large family. But smiles and beautiful children. Gosh it’s hard to write this, I worry they might read it one day and think I look down on them, which is the opposite of how I feel… I think the fact that they live in the environment they do and yet have dreams to help others and have kept a positive attitude speaks wonders.

One young woman holding what must have been a baby under a year old spoke of how her husband (Faradins nephew) had left a few months ago to work in Germany, because there were just no jobs in Romania. This is quite common from what we’ve heard, and must be very hard on the family, especially on such a young couple with a small child.

The next house we visited was on the edge of the suburb, and backed onto a large field littered with what appeared as endless rubblish… there were a few women wandering through collecting things in bags.

After stopping the car out the back of a run-down building Faradin proceeded to get five pairs of plain black new shoes out of his trunk before we headed toward the house, afterward I remember thinking I couldn’t remember what he had done with them, and I realise he must have subtly given them to someone in the house.

Some kids playing in the fields scattered with rubbish.

One of the old ladies which greeted us remembered us from our last visit and was extremely welcoming. We were led into a similar house, though this time we found out that they have no electricity to the house (as most of the area don’t) and only one stove to both cook on and heat water for bathing, there was an out-house outside and all for a large extended family. The father of five we spoke to must be quite well off, as he spoke of having two horses, a few goats, ducks and chickens, which for this area is a lot.

We heard of how his 9 year old son recently fell while playing and broke his leg badly, and had to have an operation, thankfully the government pay for children (though I’m not sure of the standard provided) but the boy is now in hospital for a month, and it is so difficult for his family to visit him. I think they said once a week, but don’t quote me on this, it’s been a long day.

Regardless it’s sad, both because his family wouldn’t have been able to afford care if not for the government, and that now this boy, who lives in a country where it’s already hard for a strong young man to get a job, is disadvantaged more than he already was.  

After staying and chatting a little we moved on… the drive out of the slums was shocking. More in the contrast out the window than anything. There literally was no smooth transition in housing conditions, an extremely wealthy suburb of houses shared a “fence” with the poorer area. It was like a dream… if you’d have blinked at the right second you would have felt as if you’d changed worlds.

The dirty rags children were wearing changed into clean pressed shirts on overweight middle-aged men, the stray dogs lining the streets were changed into expensive cars. It was eerie.

Right, well it’s that time again… BED TIME. These days exhaust me (it’s more a mental thing I think), so I’ll have to squish the rest of Saturday into the next blog. Things should be a little slower tomorrow, so it’s achievable :)

I feel like I’m leaving you on a downer, which I didn’t really mean to do. It’s difficult to try and cheer up an audience when I’m trying to keep myself in one piece too.

How about this… YES, it is terrible to see and hear about but the good news is that if these people, who live in the tough conditions and have been persecuted and have so little, can give what little they have away, and use their time to change lives for the better… YOU CAN TOO. Just think of what you could really do if you put your mind to it, or you found that gift or skill which you could use to help others in some way.

After all, the man who invented that portable water purifier doesn’t get a lot of glory… but he’s helped thousands of people living in poverty all over the world. Just a thought ;)